How To Know When To Quit Your Job
Many baby boomers—especially those at the top of their game—struggle with the decision to step down. And when they leave, the transition is often ‘painful and messy,’ says one career coach.
Many baby boomers—especially those at the top of their game—struggle with the decision to step down. And when they leave, the transition is often ‘painful and messy,’ says one career coach.
Older workers have a problem. They don’t know when to quit.
As baby boom-era CEOs, professors, lawyers, engineers and others get older and keep their jobs longer, it is raising uncomfortable questions.
Is there an art to stepping down gracefully? “I’m not sure there’s an art. I think it requires will,” says Anne Mulcahy, who was 56 when she voluntarily gave up the CEO job at Xerox to make way for her successor, Ursula Burns. She is now 68. “It’s hard. It’s not something that happens naturally if you like what you do and you’re good at it. You have to set time limits for yourself.” You also have to know what your purpose is after you retire or “you go into this void that’s really very tough,” she adds. Leaving the C-suite was one of the hardest things she’s ever done, says Ms Mulcahy, who lives in Connecticut and is now actively involved with nonprofit organizations.
Mandatory retirement at 65 ended for most jobs in the mid-1980s, giving some people the impression they could work forever. Since life expectancy has increased—from 70 years old in 1959 to about 83 for today’s 65-year-olds—many people want to work longer, for both personal and financial reasons.
At their peak, boomers, those born between 1946 and 1964, numbered almost 79 million, and their ranks include the first generation of career women and lots of people who remained single or got divorced. For many boomers, work has taken on an outsize role. It provides purpose, fulfilment and community. It creates structure and routine.
Since many work at desks or in the service industry—not manual labour—boomers also have fewer physical limitations that could cut a career short. “Retiring at 65 makes no sense. Many people are still at the height of their game,” says Gillian Leithman, a Montreal-based retirement coach who conducts seminars and corporate workshops. Nonetheless, 65 is still the line of demarcation at which everybody else thinks you should be ready to retire, regardless of whether you agree. Another career coach says it’s like having an expiration date on your forehead.
“People are turning traditional retirement age and the gas tank isn’t empty,” says Robert Laura, a Brighton, Mich.-based retirement coach and financial planner. “They can easily work til 75.”
That’s why so many people avoid planning for it. Until the pandemic, boomers were retiring at a rate of about 2 million a year. By last September, 40% of boomers in the U.S. had retired, according to a recent report by the Pew Research Center.
Dr Leithman finds that most people, even high-powered executives, put off thinking about it until the 11th hour. When she asks them what will get them out of bed in the morning in retirement, most have no idea, she says. “They’re terrified.”
The transition is so difficult that it has spawned a new industry of coaching and consulting firms that focus solely on retirement. Many are run by former corporate executives who know the difficulties first hand, like Bob Foley, former CEO of Travelodge hotels and the former human resources chief of Pyramid Hotel Group. Mr. Foley says he was called in one day by his boss, the CEO at Pyramid, who asked out of the blue if he had a plan to identify and train his successor. “I thought, ‘What, are you out of your mind?’ ” he recalls. He was 53, and the company was growing fast. “I thought, ‘Is he pushing me out? Is my life about to end?’ You go through that fear stage. Everybody does.”
He spent eight years hiring and training his much younger successor, learning to appreciate the generational differences between himself and younger workers who are more tech savvy and champing at the bit to get their turn.
Mr Foley, now a Boston-area executive career-transition coach, tells clients to retire when their skills are no longer in vogue. At Pyramid, he was against texting—he thought it too unprofessional. He didn’t think customer service could ever be entrusted to an automated chatbot. When younger employees suggested replacing an obsolete HR system that he’d created, “Boy, did I say no to that,” he says. He finally realized “these guys are smarter than I am. I finally got out of my way.” At 61, he was ready to leave.
Retirement doesn’t just happen. “The heavens don’t open up, the world isn’t at your feet when you retire,” says Mr Laura. “Retirement is a made-up phase of life. It’s nothing until you put things into it.”
He asks clients to write down how they’d spend one day in retirement; then how they’d spend a week. Often they only make it halfway through. Once people figure out retirement could last 30 years, they realize that’s a long time to play golf, knit or help register voters. They want to find something to throw themselves into, says Chip Conley, who founded Modern Elder Academy, a school in Baja California Sur, Mexico, where mid-lifers and retirees can problem-solve a career transition.
The transition is often painful and messy, says Mr Conley, 60, who founded the boutique hotel business Joie de Vivre Hospitality at age 26, sold it 24 years later, and then for a time was a strategy executive at Airbnb. “I had to end the idea that I was a CEO. I had to right-size my ego and let go of all my hotel knowledge,” he says. He likens it to “ripping off a body suit of Band-Aids.”
He warns clients about “the messy middle,” the interim period when retirees have no idea what’s next. He has them create dream boards, asking themselves, do you want to be an angel investor, author, social worker, entrepreneur? He helps them figure out what skills and experience they can apply in a new venue, as he did when he moved from the hotel industry to tech. He tells them to follow their curiosity. “If you’re passionate and engaged and curious, people lose track of your wrinkles,” he says. “They are attracted by your energy.”
Stepping down works best when you follow a plan, experts say. Don’t expect execution to be perfect. Though Ms Mulcahy knew she wanted to be in nonprofits, “the need to fill your calendar is so strong that you say yes to things you shouldn’t,” she says. “You worry about your shelf life and staying relevant.” She found in hindsight that it hadn’t been necessary to add a stint as cable news commentator to her board and nonprofit work. “It solved my itch to feel I was still part of the business world,” but it didn’t suit her, she says. “I hated it.”
She settled into a seven-year chapter chairing the board of Save the Children, a nonprofit organisation that took her all over the world. She is now focused on helping younger career women navigate the corporate world, specifically a network of 25 who meet in her apartment every quarter. “We sit around and drink wine and solve each other’s problems,” she says.
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Their careers spanned the personal computing, internet and smartphone waves. But some older workers see AI’s arrival as the cue to exit.
Luke Michel has already lived through two technology overhauls in his career, first desktop publishing in the 1980s and online publishing later on. But AI? He’s had enough.
So when his employer, the Dana-Farber Cancer Institute, made an early-retirement offer to some staff last year, the 68-year-old content strategist decided to speed up his exit. Before, he had expected to work a couple more years.
“The time and energy you have to devote to learning a whole new vocabulary and a whole new skill set, it wasn’t worth it,” he said.
It isn’t that he’s shunning artificial intelligence—he is learning Spanish with the help of Anthropic’s Claude. But, at this point, he’s less than eager to endure all the ways the technology promises to upend work.
“I just want to use it for my own purposes and not someone else’s,” he said.
After rising for decades and then hovering around 40% in the 2010s, the share of Americans over 55 years old in the workforce has slipped to 37.2%, the lowest level in more than 20 years.
The financial cushion of rising home equity and stock-market returns is driving some of the decline, economists and retirement advisers say.
But for some older professionals, money is only part of the equation.
They say they don’t want to spend the last years of their career going through the tumult of AI adoption, which has brought new tools, new expectations and a lot of uncertainty.
Many people retire when key elements of their work lives are disrupted at once, said Robert Laura , co-founder of the Retirement Coaches Association and an expert on the psychology of retirement.
“Maybe their autonomy is being challenged or changed, their friends are leaving the workplace, or they disagree with the company’s direction,” he said.
“When two or three of these things show up, that’s when people start to opt out.”
“AI is a big one,” he adds. “It disrupts their autonomy, their professionalism.”
Michel, whose work required overseeing and strategizing on website content, has been here before.
When desktop publishing arrived in the 1980s, he was a graphic designer using triangles and rubber cement.
The internet’s arrival changed everything again. Both developments required new skills, and he was energized by the challenge of learning alongside colleagues and peers.
It felt different this time around. “Your battery doesn’t hold a charge as long as it used to,” he said.
He would rather spend his energy volunteering, making art, going to operas and chairing the Council on Aging in North Andover, Mass., where he lives.
In an AARP survey last summer of 5,000 people 50 and over, 25% of those who planned to retire sooner than expected counted work stress and burnout as factors.
About half of those retired said they had left work at least partly because they had the financial security to do so.
In general, older Americans are less likely than younger counterparts to use AI, research shows.
About 30% of people from ages 30 to 49 said they used ChatGPT on the job, nearly double the share of those 50 and older, according to a 2025 Pew Research Center survey of more than 5,000 adults.
Baby boomers and members of Generation X also experienced the sharpest declines in confidence using AI technology, according to a ManpowerGroup survey of more than 13,900 workers in 19 countries.
“We as employers aren’t doing a good enough job saying (to older workers), we value the skills that you already have, so much so that we want to invest in you to help you do your job better,” says Becky Frankiewicz , ManpowerGroup’s chief strategy officer.
Jennifer Kerns’s misgivings about AI contributed to her departure last month from GitHub, where the 60-year-old worked as a program manager.
Coming from a family of artists, she said, it offends her that AI models train on the creative work of people who aren’t compensated for their intellectual property. And she worries about AI’s effect on people’s critical-thinking skills.
So she was dismayed when GitHub, a Microsoft-owned hosting service for software projects, began investing heavily in AI products and expecting employees to incorporate AI into much of their work. In employee-engagement surveys, the company had begun asking them to rate their AI usage on a scale of 1 to 5.
When it came time to write reports and reviews, colleagues would suggest that she use ChatGPT.
“I’d be like, ‘I have no idea how to use that and I have no interest in using AI to write anything for me,’” she said.
It would have been more prudent to work until she was closer to Medicare eligibility, she said. But by waiting until her children were out of college and some of her stock grants had vested, the math worked.
Her first act as a nonworking person: a solo trip to Scotland, where she took a darning workshop and learned how to repair sweaters.
“The opposite of AI,” she said.
Employers already under pressure to cut workers—such as in the tech industry—may welcome some of these retirements, said Gad Levanon , chief economist at Burning Glass Institute, which studies labor-market data.
“The more people retire, the fewer they have to let go,” he said.
Some of the savviest tech users are also balking at sticking around for the AI upheaval. Terry Grimm, who worked in IT for 40 years, retired from his senior software consultant role at 65 last May.
His firm had just been acquired by a bigger firm, which meant learning and integrating the parent company’s AI and other tech tools into his work.
Until then, Grimm expected he might work a couple more years, though he felt that he probably had enough saved to retire.
“I just got to the point where I was spending 40 hours at work and then 20 hours training and studying,” said Grimm, who has since moved with his wife from the Dallas area to a housing development on a golf course in El Dorado, Ark.
“I’m like, ‘I’ll let the younger guys do this.’”